on October 8th, 2012
Pages: 238 pages
Amazon • Narrator: Tyler Stevens
(Website, Blog, Twitter, Facebook, Goodreads)
I can’t describe what it’s like to want to scream every minute of every day.
Two years after a terrifying night of pain destroyed his normal teenage existence, Aaron Downing still clings to the hope that one day, he will be a fully functional human being. But his life remains a constant string of nightmares, flashbacks, and fear. When, in his very first semester of college, he’s assigned Spencer Thomas as a partner for his programming project, Aaron decides that maybe “normal” is overrated. If he could just learn to control his fear, that could be enough for him to find his footing again.
With his parents’ talk of institutionalizing him—of sacrificing him for the sake of his brothers’ stability—Aaron becomes desperate to find a way to cope with his psychological damage or even fake normalcy. Can his new shrink control his own demons long enough to treat Aaron, or will he only deepen the damage?
Desperate to understand his attraction for Spencer, Aaron holds on to his sanity with both hands as it threatens to spin out of control
This was an emotional book, with many little steps in recovery.
Aaron Downing was brutally attacked while he walked home with his beset friend Juliette. His bestie was killed and while the monsters tried to kill him, he survived. But they weren’t caught, so Aaron lived in perpetual fear for his life. His nightmares and trauma affected his parents and 2 brothers who looked up to him their whole lives. Aaron had a long scar scar on his face, some on his body and a lot on the inside.
Aaron struggled to make it through each day until his college professor assigned him a deaf partner for a project. Spencer Thomas was treated as freak because he was deaf, so working with Aaron gave him someone who was similar to himself. Spencer’s mother had been mugged and Spencer was delivered 3 months too early. He survived but its a cruel world as he learns to live without his mom and his alcoholic, yet brillant father.
As Spencer and Aaron work on their project together, they formed a friendship. In the meantime, Spencer’s father, who is a doctor specializing in trauma, begins to treat Aaron for his anxiety. It was step by step, but slowly Aaron gets to the point where Spencer can touch him. This revelation leads to the acknowledgement that what Aaron and Spencer feel for each other is more than friendship.
What a sad, yet hopeful story. Aaron really worked and Spencer was so persistent in being there for him. They saved each other. I am glad love helped these two lovebirds heal some of their past hurts. Aaron to Spencer “I never thought I would find someone to look past the scars. I want to try if you do”. How can you not feel that? I read that like 5 times.
But the real heroes here were family, they hung on strong and gave these two a safe place to grow their wings and fly.